Language School Plans

“Eu aindo estou aprendendo Portugues.” This is a very import phrase. It gives an explanation to people who would otherwise just stare, dumbfoundedly at me. It literally means, “I am still learning Portuguese”. But with it comes the plea, “Please cut me a little slack here, I’m not as dumb as I sound”.

Learning the language has been our main goal thus far in Brazil. We’ve been able to help out with more supportive roles, but being able to speak the language opens up endless opportunities for ministry. Recently we decided to take a month and study the language at a language school. On Feb. 12^th we will be leaving for Salvador, a city in the south where we will be living and studying for a month.

We will be taking Emily with us, who will be helping watch the kids while Brin and I study. Brin still hopes to continue home schooling Ella as well. There are a lot of unknowns about where we are going, but we are trusting that God will use this month to continue to build in us the ability to communicate with the people we came to serve.

For those of you who care about the details… we will be traveling by bus to Salvador, the 3^rd largest city in Brazil. The distance from Altamira to Salvador, approx. 1100 miles, is about the same distance from St. Louis to Key West, FL. However, what takes about 20 hours on US highways is supposed to take us about 48.

Altamira (red star) is about 1100 miles from Salvador (blue star) where we will be studying.

Learning the Ropes

Living here is not for the weak of heart. Last night Josh and I sat outside and commented how comfortable it was. There was a breeze; no bugs or the smell of decomposition that had been in our yard for the past few days. So when we do have moments of comfort, we take note. But still we are here, and now along side us, we introduce you to Emily Fancher.

Our family met Emily when she came down on a work team this past summer with her church, the Vineyard Church of Columbus, Ohio. Emily and I talked about her life, my life and where God was taking us. Then we continued emailing after her return home while, during this time, God was readying her heart for a change. Within 6 months of her first trip, she is back in Brasil this time to stay for a while. She will live with our family, help homeschool, assist at CDR (the English school) and participate in church events.

Emily, second from left, and her work team from OH.
(photo courtesy of www.shutterthink.com)

So, going back to my lead-in, Emily has a tough path ahead. Not that there won’t be fun times, because I do prioritize fun. And not that we won’t laugh, or more often be laughed at, but it is a different way of living here that takes a while to work through. I have warned Emily that there will be unpleasant moments ahead. Stressful days but not stressful in the same way as it is in a fast-paced, time-driven way back in the States. A different kind of stress, like apprehension of the unknowns and situations way out of our comfort zones. For example, we simply do not have the structure or routine here that I would like. Believe me, I tried to make it happen, but God always wakes me up in the morning with something that I had not written on my list the night before. Case in point, Emily’s first week. I made a list of what to do the first week. You’d think I’d give up on lists. Now, the first week has passed and I have gotten about 50% of it accomplished. Pretty good I might say. But the week went hardly as planned. For one thing, Ella developed a horrendous tooth infection which got her out of school, the very thing Emily came to do. And then each morning was busy with various visitors. We had lunch guests every day that week, some expected, others not. So in the midst of busy mornings, Emily just jumped in and made herself useful somewhere. Which is exactly what I needed and I was reminded once again why God brought her to our family at this time. Emily is relaxed, patient, a creative thinker. She is a good complement to me because I am forever panicking as if I’m late for some unknown event or appointment. My kids don’t annoy her (yet) so her behavior reminds me to be more understanding and tolerant as I interact with my children.

A large cockroach has decided to share the room with Emily. For a moment I think, “big deal, be happy it is not a taratula or scorpion,” then I remember my first weeks here when I freaked out because there were holes in the screens, or water pouring down my walls while Mia slept on the floor inches from a puddle forming on the tile. Now, 18 months later, I have no problems with Mia sleeping in a hammock suspended between two trees. My perspective has changed, my “normal” has morphed into something else and my comfort zone has significantly widened. And so will Emily’s, but working through that takes time and effort and is not without challenges.

Abscesses and Stitches

This past week we were struck by two unsuspecting health issues. During church last week Ella started complaining about a toothache. To be honest, we didn’t think much of it, she doesn’t have the best teeth and she had just been to the dentist to have a cavity filled. However, in the morning when the roof of her mouth and gum had swollen to the point of virtually covering her tooth, we took notice. We’ve had her on antibiotics with little response. She doesn’t talk much unless it is to remind us her pain meds are wearing off. So for the past few days Ella has gotten lots of attention and minimal hours in school. Now it’s Mia’s turn.

This morning, Mia and Ava were playing when I heard Mia screaming bloody murder. As I inspected a gash on Mia’s chin Ava explained that all they were doing was playing a game where Mia holds onto the counter and Ava lifts her legs up. Obvious we’re not teaching our kids enough deductive reasoning.

So we hopped in the car, and along with Denise, a Brasilian friend, we were able to experience our first trip to an “Emergency Room.” The first hospital we went to was closed for painting. So we went to a different one that had about 10 people sitting on a bench in the entrance. A trail of blood drops were leading to another room while flies went wherever they pleased. We waited. No one took our names. No one asked about what the health complaint was. There certainly was no asking about insurance. There were no charts to be seen nor did anyone have an ID armband. The phone rang and rang and no one answered it. Then a doctor stepped around a corner and motioned us in. There was no nurse, no secretary, no janitor. Only that one doctor who was sweating because he had a long patient list since the other hospital was closed and apparently had no one to help him. Brin lent a hand. Mia, however, was probably the most miffed by the whole experience. I don’t think she saw what was coming. Two stitches later she’s a little wiser and more leery than ever about any kind of medicine.

You Are the Music in Me

In Belem, we stayed at a hotel where another family from Rio was also staying. And as kids often do, Ella and another girl found each other and became playmates during the stay at this hotel. But despite the vast difference in communication and culture, they quickly found one common denominator (I am a homeschooling mom so I have math on the brain). What is the universal language for 9 year olds? In this case it was High School Musical 2. This girl had the movie (in Portuguese) that Ella had not seen yet but was eagerly anticipating. Ella was amazed and the girl was happy to have someone to watch it with her.

So later we found the movie and justifying that it would help with learning Portuguese, we bought the movie too. Later when we arrived back in Altamira, Cleide and Marilda wanted to see it so we let them invite a few friends and we had a High School Musical 2 party. And for those of you who know the music, and my empathy goes out to you….você e a música em mim.

~BP

To Surubim with the Family

This past weekend I returned to the village of Surubim with some friends, this time Brin and the girls went. Taking the girls reminded me of how primitive some of these conditions are. For the most part they enjoyed our trip, except for the Amazonian “no-see-ums”, little irritating bugs that have a real bite.

A highlight of the trip was talk about a local man being willing to donate land for a church to be built. I’m not sure what the timeframe would be, but it’s exciting to think about being involved in that.

Brin enjoyed this kitchen about as long as it took to take this picture. The stove was fired by wood, the water for washing dishes was a quarter mile away in a dirty creek and the lights were dirty oil burning lamps. Oh yeah, and refrigerated meat is hanging above the stove. At least the bugs didn't like it in there either.

The dishwasher was no Maytag.

The girls, used to plentiful water on river trips, had to settle for this less than desirable stream.

We are told this trip can take anywhere between 3 and 8 hours, depending on the rain. Being at the beginning of the rainy season, these puddles will only get worse.

Part of the frame broke on one of the motorcycles and we had to remove the rear fender. It made for a fun return trip with mud being thrown all over the driver.

On the barge crossing the Xingu River.

Fruit

I don’t know why we keep making the same mistake over and over, but we again arrived at someone’s house on time. This time it was a birthday dinner that one of my friend’s dad wanted to host for me. We were told it started at 7:00, so we stupidly arrived at 7:00. Only my friend’s parents were there. Not even my friend was there. We wondered if we got the message right.

But what began awkwardly, soon became very comfortable and natural, a night I won’t forget. Before we ate the fish his dad had prepared, my friend read a verse and told everyone how much my friendship meant to him. It felt very surreal, like I was being accepted into a club. But more than that, I realized that my friend, Alison, truly felt a connection with me. He wanted to show me that, and I truly felt honored. He went on to thank me for the sacrifice I have made to come and live here.

I often have doubts of my effectiveness. Even as a youth pastor I experienced these doubts. The fruit I so often expected did not always result in the time and way I thought it should. And so often God would reveal in little ways that He was working, that He was in control and more importantly that He is the Producer of fruit. What I saw last night was a fruit basket. And it made me excited to see how God was going to produce more in the future.

Irony

Ronesha (or maybe it was Camila) used to have a cat named Irony. The cat was funny because it got hit by a car and afterwards only walked in circles. The following story is not about her.

In the past month I had conversations/emails with 2 friends, Connie Gregory and a college friend Bethany. Connie is a missionary here in Brazil in a nearby city (nearby being relative) with PAZ and Bethany is working with New Tribes in Indonesia. Both of these women had high, emotion filled hopes of hosting guest houses and then, for various reasons, had to let go of their plans. At the time, I listened but thought it a bit ironic to hear these stories of their departure from guesthouse ministry as I was entering mine. I must admit I really did not empathize completely as I have now experienced a small fraction of the pain they endured. Now just to decide who will be president of the club.

no. maybe. no. well, ok maybe. yes. yeah, i think so. Yes! no.

If you notice things like this, we have had a paragraph at the right of this blog that has asked for prayer about our next housing situation. Wanna know where we are with that? Me too. As it turns out, we are 3 weeks away from when we will need to move and we still have no firm answer. But here is where we find ourselves at the moment and the story that goes with it.

While we were thinking of our options, an obvious solution came to the forefront. The mission’s Guest House, which houses the Kubacki family now, will be empty in February. It is big, comfortable, a hub of activity (can you see why I am interested?) and within the mission compound which kind of gives me a sense of safety. Plus, if we moved in there it would fill a need for the mission, as we understood it. So we thought about it. Talked about it. Discussed it with other people. And I started dreaming and planning for it. As I got more enthusiastic about it we began to put other options aside and starting thinking through the details that would be required of us to live there. Things like what, exactly, are the responsibilities of the guesthouse hosts, what role do we play with foreign teams that come through, and how this will work with our family. So again we talked with more people and got positive responses to the point that we thought it was all a go. We were wrong. Are my tender feelings revealing themselves here yet?

A conversation took place 3 days ago that revealed that the guesthouse is not a right fit for our family. I am heart broken. At first, I was upset that God was steering us in one direction only to frustrate us and send us in another direction. I see now how this whole process shaped us and prepared us for the future here in Brazil, whatever that may be. We gained awareness of our own family’s needs and goals and decided to evaluate our decisions against that. I still know I would have loved the guesthouse and enjoyed taking care of guests, but it is not as simple as that. I am trying to put it behind me because even if money issues worked itself out and other details fell in to place, we now are aware of how living there might induce stress and tensions that we simply do not need in our first term here. So that’s that. But, stink! I am just not sure how to pack up all my enthusiasms and just be ok with moving elsewhere. Yikes, my heart is bruised.

These sentiments are rather reminiscent of when I foster-cared for two little boys about 3 years ago. I knew I would not keep them. But I did dream about what it would be like to love them, take care of their illnesses, raise them up with a secure family and have them prank me with Parent Trap moments (they were twins). But it was all just thoughts and dreams and a short time later I turned them over to another foster family. I had packed away all the schemes I dreamed and nuturings I imagined, only to dust them off feel them all over again, just differently. I guess these sort of disappointments are normal consequences of just plain living and feeling.

Ok, so this is a long post just to say, “we’re not moving into the guest house.” But I wanted to share at a heart level where we have come from and where we are going. As I have trudged through this whole thing I am amazed at how God has been preparing me for this situation. My time and conversations with God in the last 6 months have been about living dependent on the Spirit regardless of what is happening around me. This small, somewhat insignificant (compared over a lifetime) event had the potential for bitterness. My heart could be soaking in sour brine right now. But it is not. I am praying constantly and literally, out loud, telling myself not to let my heart get crusty. And it might be working, with credit not going to me. C’mon people, cheer with me! I do not know for sure where I am going in 3 weeks and I am ok with that! I told you I’ve changed.

So for those of you who have stuck with this long post, here is what is happening. Barring working out details (again with the details?!) we will stay in the home of the Hanson family who is home on furlough. They are a lovely family with a lovely home so I can only heave a thankful sigh in how God takes care of us. We have yet to communicate with them because we have been without Internet for a while (so this blog was actually written earlier and posted later).

More happenings involve the arrival of Emily Fancher! Many of you know the name because you’ve prayed for her and for that I am thankful and also desperate for your prayers to continue because she has yet to get her visa. But then again, maybe she has and I don’t know it. Drat that internet. Emily is 23! Appreciates the arts! Has a calm, gentle spirit! And a tugging in her heart for missions! Her coming brings out the explanation points in me! She is hopefully arriving in Altamira on January 20 and will live with our family. She will help at the English School, help home school Gabriella and Ava (if she can catch her, ha!) and get a hearty helping of Xingu Mission. In the past, Josh has had an influence on young people and their involvement and knowledge of foreign missions. This time it is my turn!

Other happenings involve the return of the Simon family. They will be leaving the states the beginning of Feb. We look forward to having them back and will probably talk their ears off filling them in on the 5 months they were gone. Mia and Anna will go back to playing dress-up together and Ava and Caleb will go back to arguing.

Genuine thanks to those of you who are praying for us. I cannot imagine how messy it would be here without those prayers.

~BZP